New Statistics for the Pastime…

Big Tony from Bayonne recently commented “This is a simple sport – there is definitely no need to complicate it .

I was reminded again of  this is today when a tekkie on Facebook commented “Just received my TDI SL i must admit I’m a little intimidated by it.”   Then, maybe thirty minutes later,  a TV sports show throws out another one of those off-the-wall baseball statistics…the WHIP rating, like it was everyday verbiage.  I Googled it and found it on a website called HardballTimes.com  For the record WHIP means….

“in baseball statistics, walks plus hits per inning pitched (WHIP) is a sabermetric measurement of the number of baserunners a pitcher has allowed per inning pitched. WHIP reflects a pitcher’s propensity for allowing batters to reach base, therefore a lower WHIP indicates better performance.”

batterScrolling down just a tad I found….DER, Defense Efficiency Ratio. “The percent of times a batted ball is turned into an out by the teams’ fielders, not including home runs. The exact formula we use is (BFP-H-K-BB-HBP-Errors)/(BFP-HR-K-BB-HBP). This is similar to BABIP, but from the defensive team’s perspective. Please note that errors should include only errors on batted balls.”

I wondered if it was just baseball that had these batshit crazy statistics, but guess what?  It wasn’t. In basketball there’s BPM, and get a load of this…..

“Box Plus/Minus (BPM) is a box score-based metric for evaluating basketball players’ quality and contribution to the team. It is the latest version of a stat previously called Advanced Statistical Plus/Minus; it is NOT a version of Adjusted Plus/Minus, which is a play-by-play regression metric.”

“BPM relies on a player’s box score information and the team’s overall performance to estimate a player’s performance relative to league average. BPM is a per-100-possession stat, the same scale as Adjusted Plus/Minus: 0.0 is league average, +5 means the player is 5 points better than an average player over 100 possessions (which is about All-NBA level), -2 is replacement level, and -5 is really bad.”

Now I am a very avid sports fan, and in my younger years played a little baseball and basketball, but I have never heard of statistics like WHIP and DER. I suspect they exist because we have become preoccupied with technology and frivolous bullshit.

goldbert3

A Rube Goldberg invention…1914

Take metal detectors….. The manufacturers now offer numbers, graphs, up, down, left and right arrows, GPS, audio responses from The Twilight Zone, NASA sounding names, directions to Noah’s Ark, and a message that if you don’t buy it today, someone will beat you to it.

Understand that I don’t have a problem with marketing, selling, or with anyone pissing away their hard-earned money.  It’s yours to do with as you see fit, but please know that top of the line TDI-CTX-PI, Omega, Delta, Explorer, deep-seeking Piffwanger-Pro, with the “imported” 44 inch, wide scan, elliptical, double D, spider coil, will probably never repay you your initial financial outlay. Well that ought to garner a few emails from the manufacturers.

However, to keep you all happy (and busy), I’ve decided to follow suit with baseball and basketball, and came up with the following metal detecting/treasure hunting statistics & abbreviations, which take effect immediately….

METAL DETECTING/TREASURE HUNTING STATS & ABBREVIATIONS

TFPO  = Total Finds Per Outing

TCPO = Total Coins Per Outing

TFPH = Total Finds Per Hour

ROGTB = Ratio of good to bad finds

TOYTV = Total YouTube Videos

NUBCA = Number of Unnecessary But Cool Looking Accessories

NAVAWC = Number of Video Appearances Wearing Camo

NUFHPO = Number of Unfilled Holes Per Outing

NTSFDV = Number of Times Same Find is Shown in Different Videos

NTALIV = Number of Times Acting Like Idiot in Video

BVWHB = Best Video With Heavy Breathing

CFSBLC = Can’t Find Shit But Looks Cool (doing it)

DWMEE = Detectorist With Most Expensive Equipment

BDLOSP = Best Detector Leaning on Shovel Photo

and finally…

DWFAMYSH = Detectorist Whose Finds Always Makes You Say “Hmm…yeah right”

 
So in the future you might see “Henry’s TFPO wasn’t very good, but his ROGTB was excellent, and his NUNBCA was off the wall. His hunting companion Willy, who is best known for his NTALIV, didn’t fare well at all, but his CFSBLC was excellent.

And to make you really happy….here’s another abbreviation ODWPM (old detectorists who piss and moan).

 

BRAINFART

Think I might start a business called Rent a Kid, and franchise it.  It’s for those tekkies who are worried about knocking on doors. A cute little five or six-year kid standing by your side just might make the difference. What do you think?

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30 Comments

Filed under Metal Detecting

30 responses to “New Statistics for the Pastime…

  1. danhughes1

    Dick, I have a softball stat that serves me well – the OBA. That’s On Base Average, and it’s simply the percentage of times a batter gets on base. Whether by a hit, a walk, or an error – doesn’t matter. Bottom line is, how often does this guy get on base? The higher your OBA, the higher you bat in my lineup.

    As for your treasure hunting stats, I love ’em! Wish I’d thought of it first! Mind if I use them (fully credited, of course) in a podcast?

  2. I was laughing my ass off, then I got to BDLOSP, now I’m laughing so hard I’m crying. You pegged it.

  3. Digging History

    Cheered me up no end Dick, thank you 😀

  4. Bigtony

    Dick, thanks for the laughs.

    I too was laughing real hard and still wonder why folks take photo’s with their shovels and detectors then post them somewhere. Right now CFSBLC is where I am at, but hey it’s just a hobby\sport and now we have cool acronyms to boot!

  5. wintersen

    Love the initials!
    BDLOSP is a classic of its genre.
    Can we have a pithy one for ‘read my palm and appreciate my filthy fingernails before you notice the blurred picture of a minuscule coin’ shot?

  6. wintersen

    Nah. The palm is usually clean with perfect focus. It’s the fingernails that are gross … dirty and like talons.

  7. Bob K

    Dick you hit the mark on the abbreviations. Wonder if you would let the wife (she the secretary for MWAS) use them in her newsletter. She will credit you, as she reads your site all the time.
    very cool abbreviations. Sandy said if you will she will thank you in advance and give you lots of credit.
    P.S. send us RAIN please.

  8. Gary

    Ha, the latest episode of Detectorists had a good scene talking about detecting abbreviations…

    • Thanks Gary, will try and catch that episode….not really a big fan of the treasure shows on TV. Tried to be, but always came away feeling dumbed down somehow (of course that’s not hard to do)…..

  9. wintersen

    The UK Detectorists series is not a ‘treasure show’ Dick, but an award winning programme based on the hobby … these acronyms were explained by Lance …

    BOAT – Belt off a Tractor
    POACH – Part of a Combine Harvester

    • John, Gary messaged and informed that was the one he was talking about. We have “Diggers” over here, and it’s pretty lame. The BBC is indeed different. What would I do without you?

      Gary informs me that there’s a plug in I can download that will allow me to watch here. I plan to look into it….

  10. danhughes1

    My latest podcast is based on Dick’s treasure acronyms. Give a listen at http://thetreasurecorner.com

  11. wintersen

    Mr Pedantic says that Dick’s fine efforts are NOT acronyms, but simply initials. An acronym is a word formed from the first letter or first few letters of each word in a phrase …

  12. wintersen

    Now, that’s an acronym.
    You’ve cracked it Dick, and I like it.
    John Winter’s an ODWIP! … an old ex-detectorist who is picky

  13. And the point of my post was to keep things simple….sheesh!

  14. Bigtony

    Gary, how is the other show, British secret treasures?

  15. david glover

    You left out a very important one, GLBISDV = Good looking Babes in Swimsuits Detecting Video

  16. Mike Smith

    Great post Dick, enjoyed it very much!

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