Diggin’ Deep and I Ain’t Talkin’ Depth…

The following dispatch came from John Howland, via the Mayfly Pub.

Howl5When it comes to helping others, detectorists are seldom slow in thrusting their hands deep into their pockets, but what about when it comes to help saving the world’s best detector-found database, the Portable Antiquities Scheme? In the few days the Justgiving appeal has been going, FIVE people have stepped up to the plate and donated between them, £195.00.

One acidic critic of the PAS (and detectorists generally) had this to say: “Donations to the PAS seem to have stopped: “Supporting the Portable Antiquities Scheme” £195.00 raised 5 donations (100, 50, 20, 20 and 5 pounds), divide that by 8000 English metal detectorists – that’s 2,44p per head so far from the ungrateful oiks. They are probably out at rallies now digging up who-knows-what.”

So come on all you “ungrateful oiks” why not donate a £ or four, to help protect the world’s best recording metal detecting find’s scheme. Why not, if you are having a rally or a club meeting, have a whip round and take 50p – less than the price of a Coke – from every member and give the PAS a well needed lift. The alternative if the PAS goes belly-up through lack of the readies is too awful to contemplate, but in where the empty-headed, archaeological dickheads live, the PAS’s demise is a long-awaited victory. Some in the archaeological blogosphere are already licking their chops at the prospect of detectorists coming up short. Go to https://www.justgiving.com/finds/ for more information.

Maybe, just maybe, manufacturers might cough up or make available at discount, equipment to be used as raffle prizes at club meetings with the profits donated to the PAS. Clubs can donate under their own name and see their efforts publically displayed and others can see the leading donating clubs and individuals. So get your secretary’s on the job now, or better still, appoint the ‘Geezer’ member of the club, you know the one, he the go-getter second-hand car rep to raise the dosh.


A Texan arkie walks into a crowded bar, waving a pistol in the air yelling, “This here’s a .45 Colt Auto with an eight shot magazine, and I want to know the treasure hunter’s name who’s been sleeping with my wife.”

A voice from the back of the room yells back, “You ain’t got enough ammo!”



….There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn’t true; the other is to accept that which people who claim to be ‘experts’ tell you.

I’ll see y’all in the bar!

The Mayfly



Thanks to Robert James Ellis for sharing the following,…




With this being “throwback” Thursday and with the above “then and now” page, I thought it might be fun to show Howland at his finest. The photo on the left is how he really enjoys trout fishing. The photo on the right was for the wife. The cheap SOB even tried to take the trout back to the vendor for a refund.






For the record….still alive and kicking. Just busy rewriting and updating my first book.  I will be publishing it myself this time around, and if all goes well it should be available sometime in October.



Filed under Metal Detecting

5 responses to “Diggin’ Deep and I Ain’t Talkin’ Depth…

  1. Roy Rutledge

    When you have finished rewriting this massive tome, sign me up for the first one.

  2. Tweed Cap

    Completely agree

  3. bigtony

    I would like one as well….

  4. Hey Bubba…this beer in the bar is strong. The barkeeper here says he remembers you. Yeh, he asks me to ask you if you can send him the £10 note he lent you.

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