You Know What I Hate?


Was visiting a Facebook page and found a poster fawning over his recently found Walking Liberty Half Dollar.  According to him it was his favorite coin, his best find, his benchmark for success up to this point.


At first I didn’t think too much about it, and then it dawned on me….. He was probably a younger tekkie, not even alive when the “walker” was in circulation, and it held an allure quite different from mine. You see I remember actually using that coin to pay for things.  He did not and thus his deeper appreciation for it.

I tend to forget that silver coins were taken out of circulation around 1965.  Given that I was born in ’41, I had 14 years to get used to “Walkers, STL quarters, Buffalo and Barber nickels and yes, even a few Indian Head pennies thrown in.  Just one more reminder that I am one old SOB.


And yes, those old coins were truly pieces of art….bring them back!



Wednesday I received an email from a detectorist  that read: “why don’t you just tell us about everything you dislike and get it over with”?  Apparently he or she (was signed B.T.) is not thrilled with my piss and moan talents.  So, here you go B.T…. 100 things I dislike, and for the record, no one is forcing you to read this blog (note the disclaimer at the top of this page).


  1. Archaeologists, especially Warsaw archaeologists
  2. Camo
  3. Monotonous tekkie videos
  4. Ridiculously expensive detectors
  5. Shovels
  6. Detecting Bans
  7. Detecting Permits
  8. Suits & Ties
  9. Aches & Pains
  10. People who are “somehow” able to detect 24/7 and still pay their bills
  11. Organizations that promise the moon, and then ride off into the sunset
  12. Expensive hunts/rallies
  13. Unnecessary detecting accessories and frills
  14. Unfilled holes
  15. False advertising
  16. People who claim they make a living metal detecting
  17. Beating around the bush (say it for crissakes)
  18. Smart phones
  19. Pulltabs
  20. Broccoli, Cauliflower & Beets
  21. Making mountains out of mole hills
  22. People who have no sense of humor
  23. People who don’t drink
  24. People who don’t curse
  25. All the “absolutely must have” searchcoils
  26. People who don’t like dogs
  27. Tekkies who drool about working with archaeologists
  28. Photos of crap that the finder just had to share on the internet
  29. Blogs, websites, FB pages & podcasts that have to give things away to get people to participate
  30. Tekkies who dress like they are members of a swat team
  31. Archaeologists who want us to learn how they do it, but who have no interest at all in how we do it
  32. Reality TV shows
  33. Buying lottery tickets and not winning
  34. Long lines
  35. Sitting in Traffic
  36. Being out of wine
  37. Being out of pasta
  38. Being out of wine and pasta
  39. Dallas black gumbo
  40. Fire ants
  41. Archaeologists who won’t share their credentials
  42. Tekkies who take the pastime much too seriously
  43. Tekkies who care more about how they look than about what they find
  44. Tekkies who have to take a photo of their finds (good or bad) in a clump of dirt
  45. Tekkies whose best finds are always found “on my way back to the car”
  46. Manufacturers who use “new and improved” in their advertising
  47. Not supporting your “local” metal detector dealer
  48. Being out of wine
  49. Repeating things over and over (a.k.a. nagging)
  50. Archaeologists who get upset when detectorists find anything of historic interest
  51. Snow
  52. Taxes
  53. Small Talk
  54. Detectorists who share way too much on social media
  55. Detectorists who can’t be bothered with a threat to our pastime because it doesn’t affect them
  56. Heavy metal detectors
  57. Noisy restaurants
  58. Crowds
  59. Shoot ‘em up, blow ‘em up movies
  60. Texas wine
  61. Tekkies who find hoards and don’t share with me
  62. Towns and cities that ban detecting but are quick to pave over anything green
  63. Being out of wine
  64. Unappreciative people
  65. People who have a hard time “telling it like it is”
  66. People who buy things only because someone “famous” uses it
  67. Windows is looking for a solution to the problem
  68. Arkies who blame us because THEY aren’t working
  69. Tekkies who still wonder whether coins sink in the ground
  70. Texas summers
  71. People who use you for their personal and financial gain, then a week later don’t know you
  72. Jerry Jones
  73. Items that keep going up in price but keep getting smaller
  74. People who don’t like to read
  75. Kindles & Nooks
  76. Lawyers and politicians
  77. Airlines that use the terms “first class” and “second class”
  78. People who know it all and keep reminding you of that
  79. Clutter
  80. Pharmaceutical companies
  81. Young people who think THEY will never get old
  82. New detectors that are really old detectors, only with a new model number
  83. Mosquitos
  84. My “can’t lose horses” coming in last
  85. Working out
  86. Dieting
  87. Photos of detectors “leaning” on a shovel. I get the “cool” factor..enough already
  88. Owner manuals more than 15 pages long
  89. Those people who hang out in coffee shops with their laptops (is that supposed to be cool?)
  90. Mexican food
  91. Yankee restaurants that advertise BBQ and Texas restaurants that advertise Philly cheese steaks
  92. Being out of wine
  93. People who don’t like stinky cheeses
  94. Tekkies who are suddenly close friends because they are “in town for a few days”
  95. People who “still” think wearing their baseball cap backward makes them look cool
  96. People who recommend a business or service and have to finish with “tell ’em __________ sent you.
  97. People who can take a very simple topic and just beat it to death
  98. Telemarketers and “robocalls”
  99. People texting while driving
  100. People who can’t find 100 things to piss and moan about

And for the record B.T., I could have kept going….



Someone asked what the “Pug Bug” was.  You will find an explanation here in a post from 2013. Scroll down to:

Little Yellow Bugs



Well I was pretty excited about a site that I had lined up, but so far it’s gone from a mini lake to ass high grass and a gazillion mosquitos. I know at some time it will be mowed and so I wait.



And if you think I piss and moan, check out Beavis and Butthead…try not to laugh!

The Three Arrrrs, Reading, Riting and Ripping





Filed under Metal Detecting

27 responses to “You Know What I Hate?

  1. danhughes1

    Fun list, Dick, except for #23.

    “I don’t drink, and I don’t chew,
    And I don’t go with girls who do.” (Homer & Jethro, The Battle of Kookamonga, 1959.)

  2. Paul Vandehey

    Love the list. Sorry about the lack of wine.

  3. Arthur J Fleming

    I would have to agree with at least 95 of the items, but you forgot one. Running out of wine. Dunno what it say’s about me, but I find list’s of what I don’t like easier to compile, than list’s of things I do like.

  4. James

    Can’t argue with that list. Nope, not one bit!

  5. Ha Ha Yep, I can see why you aren’t forum material. I can relate. I’m glad cheap lemon cookies and the Ace 250 didn’t make the list. We know how to live here in Missouri. Good post.

  6. Big Tony

    Dick, cool list and a real long one too…. Mine is a lot shorter then yours…..

    Here is one – you should have been there when we found these bust halves!
    Here is another one – Are you getting out?
    Exactly where did you find that coin?
    And then there’s – Hey can you drive today and I’ll take you to the site where we found the silvers (even though it’s all covered up now with 10 inches of new dirt before they seed it). We can try the surrounding grass areas.
    I guess mine are about what people say or don’t say in this hobby, and most don’t share or include others. Sharing makes this hobby alive with unforgettable memories, like the many you have from all of the good folks you have met in it. You are right! Not many get that tremendous find so what is the big deal? Come to think of it – no one I know or heard of has given up their day jobs!

    • As I said Tony, I could have kept going. May do it at a later date.

      And I thought you were independently wealthy after finding all that bling?

  7. heavymetalnut

    laughing at your list of 100. #56 should be removed. heavy metal music and a good solid built detector ya can’t go wrong with either \m/

    • It did sound like that huh… Thought you would have been pissed at the baseball cap mention.

      Anyway, glad you had a good laugh “Beanie”…

  8. Jeez…only 100 things you hate…you must be mellowing!

    What about #101…people who borrow $20 (in AC) to buy a round of drinks (in 1986) then have a lapse of memory???? Huh? Huh?

    • That’s almost forty years ago….look at the short term memory statement above.

      • This is wonderful stuff from the maestro of muddled thinking and unintended mirth:-

        Blogger Paul Barford said…
        Well, I think the relationship between metal detecting and educated attitudes is well illustrated by the standard of prose of the blog of the Texan metal detectorist who sent his readers over here in sheep-like droves (admonishing them to try to avoid “laughing”). Self-centred half-brains the lot of them.
        8 June 2015 at 21:03

        So educated attitudes don’t come up to Texan standards, eh? I could have told him that but it’s nice to have him say so.

        Hahahahahahah! Fancy calling academics self-centred, half-brains…. hahahaha! Mind you, in your case…hahahahah! Oh, too much! Hahahahaha!

  9. # 42-Tekkies who take the pastime much too seriously
    #55-Detectorists who can’t be bothered with a threat to our pastime because it doesn’t affect them
    My favorites ^^

  10. del

    Ha ha , lol what a list !! well this would explain why your such a breath of fresh air and delight on most of the media outlets Dick . I must admit there are a couple from your list , #10 ,#16 that irk me as well but some of those Mr. Stout are out there and would suggest some professional counseling (or heavy wine consumption) to cope with such emotions. lol lol Seriously though , thanks for the enjoyable laugh and the light hearted read sir.


  11. I am honored to be represented on this list at least 3 times (unless you also hate people who are honored to be represented on ‘things I hate’ lists). I am mystified as well as to how you whittled the list down to only 100 things.

  12. wintersen

    Even though we live on separate continents, Dick and I have a lot in common. For example, we look and think the same, are of similar age, keep a blog, like a drop of wine, and are curmudgeonly most of the time. Yet, in some ways we can be very different from each other. He would probably say ‘different than’ in that last sentence.

    And yes, it’s the American use of language that irritates me. Notice I didn’t say ‘hate’. If permitted, I would like to add one more to that comprehensive list and that is a fine old English word that has lost its meaning in the States. Once it had to do with ‘awe’, but now it means ‘great’. Others often describe any piece of pre-1950 crap found by American detectorists as ‘awesome’. They use it to describe everything. It’s lazy. The term is beginning to conquer the world!

    Although sharing so much with Dick, I like to think that any ‘piss and moan’ talents I have are hard to discern on my blog – where I try to keep subjects interesting, upbeat and varied in content. So I’ll end on something to help make you smile. This is a true story.

    In the coffee shop this week I overheard an old man telling his much younger and rather pretty companion that he had friends in their 70’s who didn’t use glasses. “Eye surgery?” she enquired. “No,” he said, “They drink straight out of the bottle.”

    By the way, I’m giving away a tether on my blog this month. (See number 29 on the hate list). It’s not because I have to do it to get people to participate, but a little thanks to those who do! Take a look at: 🙂

  13. Thanks John… allow me to piss and moan about words too. I hate the word “sweet”. Detecting finds are nice, neat, good, great, but not sweet.

    I just checked out the tether, and I am sorry to hear you need one. Then again I might need one as well when I get to be your age.

    If those of you reading this are not familiar with John’s site be sure to check it out. It’s one of the best metal detecting blogs out there.

  14. wintersen

    Dick … I think you can be a sweet old duffer when you set your mind to the task. The comment above is truly awesome. Thank you.

  15. One more… “Given that I was born in ’41, I had 14 years to get used to… I am assuming that you didn’t start using currency until the age of 10.

    • Actually I was into real estate at a very young age. Somewhere around 5 or 6. The market was in a down cycle and it was too good to pass up.

      Okay miner you win. 101 will read “old men who bullshit”

  16. I guess some might see you as a negative rather than a positive force in the hobby. I would have to go with the latter but I am probably in the minority.

    There certainly is not a shortage of positive issues if one considers showing of finds and telling of sites they hunted positive. There is a shortage of discussion on the things that negatively affect the hobby most.

    Those things that negatively affect the hobby could be discussed in a fun way the same way other things are discussed. The problem is that it takes more effort to discuss those issues. They also clutter up sites where people want to make a name for themselves and need followers to do that.

    If they look look back I hope they don’t feel like they wasted the opportunity to help the hobby. They might as well continue to feel good about themselves as it wouldn’t be fair to have to put up with their drama when they weren’t willing to put up with other’s.

  17. Ed B.

    A wonderful blend of humor and truth. Thanks for the list. Hopefully #101-#200 will be forthcoming.

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