Time in Grade…

I learned about “time in grade” when I was in the Army back in the 60’s and it came to mind today as I was putting this post together.  For those of you who are not familiar with this term…..

“Time in grade” refers to the time somebody has spent actually doing a job, studying a subject or holding a position. Time in grade can be a factor in qualifying for promotion, getting a new job or receiving a certificate”.


It came to mind because my last post brought on a few heated back and forth exchanges when my good friend Rob (a.k.a. Ozarks) threw out “like shooting fish in a bucket” and “put me where they are, and I’d be equally successful is all I’m saying. Research isn’t THAT hard anyway, heck you could walk through random woods there and find cellar holes”. 

Well Rob I love you man but I have to strongly disagree.  First off both statements are “assumptions”.  You have no way of knowing what you or anyone else could do without actually being there under the very same circumstances. Just too many variables to be saying things like that. Likewise researching and finding these sites is not always easy.

I have watched Dave and Todd over a period of time, know many of their friends, know of their reputations and they have proven to me that what they find is the result of a lot of sweat and hard work.

And Rob suppose you posted a video or a few photos of rare relics you found in your neck of the woods and Dave and/or Todd followed up with either of the terms you used.  How would you feel? Would you agree? I doubt it, and please know that I would be backing YOU up and be nailing them to the wall for boasting such things.

Now having said all this I could and would kick Chicago Ron’s ass in a New York Minute if I had the opportunity to spend all those days in the English countryside and he knows it.  He also knows I am full of crap, that I am kidding and that I would surely spend those days in a pub, not digging in the dirt.

Anyway I hope these comments did not make this situation worse. That was not my intention.  I just think sometimes in the heat of the argument it’s best to sit back and consider your words before you post something you will regret and/or something that will come back and bite you in the ass. Trust me, I’ve been there and done it (more than once).

“In my mind, I am this awesome, adventurous bad ass. But in reality I am just a bookworm that really likes wine”…..S.L. Jennings


 As a follow-up to all this, Roger Barbrick forwarded the following and all you cellar dwellers need to read it and be careful….thanks Roger.

Fatal Black Bear Attack in New Jersey is First in Recent History 





Heading to Denver for the weekend to see family and looking forward to it.  Have never been there but I’ve been told I will see mountains. I have forgotten what they look like. No such thing here in my neck of the woods. I am however disappointed to learn that the term “mile high city” refers to something other than what I thought. Damn!

In the meantime I’ve turned the rest of this update over to the Malamute Saloon and John Howland. If by chance you see the mention of Wally and Harry don’t get excited.  It’s a one time mirage.



Those readers with a query about the ATPro International, or who disagree with, or dispute anything I’ve written – about anything – or who wishes to point out an error I’ve published, please put fingers to keyboard and say so! I’ll take more notice if you use your own name…after all; you know mine. Don’t be like one person who disagreed with something I’d written, and then failed to pay me the common courtesy of saying why!

Okay… so let’s get the juices flowing. In my view, the Garrett ‘ATPro International’ is just about the best all-round machine ever made (especially on beaches) and for the price is an absolute steal. It’s waterproof to ten feet, dustproof, and relegates ferrous junk to the trash can when used up in the trashy dry sand areas of the beach. Over wet saltwater sand, it’s up there with the Great and the Good.

That said, despite what the men-in-white-coats in downtown Garland would have you believe, it is a machine that takes some learning, and in my view, is not for the hard of understanding. Take the Stradivarius violin for example; most violinists can bash out a tune on one, but in the hands of a maestro, well…need I go on?

In a beach environment, the ATPro ‘International’ works BEST in the hands of a user who not only knows how to operate it, but who also knows WHERE to use it!

The sniper coil

The sniper coil

One of the facets that makes the ATPro so versatile is the variety of ancillary coils available from Garrett but the most common error I encounter when chatting with beachcombers is nearly all them opt for a large coils and empty finds pouches. Big coils, they imagine, equals more and deeper finds…WRONG!!! WRONG!!! WRONG!!! Apart from having the obvious advantage of slightly greater ground coverage, and their slightly greater depth on coins and rings, large coils in my experience are less useful than small 5-inch ones.

If you really want a second coil always choose a small diameter one as this will give you unrivalled access to the ‘money vault’ which lays in that part of the beach where BBQ’s are held and identified by a profusion bottle caps, foil, ring-pulls, cola, beer cans, and all manner of other metallic junk people are too lazy to take home or drop in the nearest litter bin. It’s the area where other hunters steer well clear and for good reason; standard and large coils in these areas are as much uses as concrete parachutes. They ain’t a lot o’ good either in the rocky areas of beach where many coins are ‘end-on’.

As an illustration, my 4.5-inch ‘Super Sniper’ for example, lifted a 2,000-yr old Roman coin (Rome Mint) from a beach where a local user was hunting with a non-Garrett machine lashed to a coil the size of a wagon-wheel. He walked over it! Small coils rule in rocky and trashy areas; I’m not arguing the point… I’m telling you!

2000 year old Roman coin

2000 year old Roman coin




Those of you who like watching videos of coins and finds had better go and put the coffee pot on as they won’t find that kind of dross here. Come back in ten minutes while the rest of us get to grips with the assholes plaguing this hobby. Many of our new readers probably don’t realise that the blogosphere ‘out there’ is populated by some very unpleasant people who have lost all grasp of reality, manners, and who are mostly posing as ‘serious’ heritage types who surrendered what shreds of common decency they possessed to behave like hormonal teenagers who can’t have their way in outlawing the metal detecting hobby. Mostly we ignore them; they being toothless pit-bulls, but occasionally, the extent of their low-calibre, low-brow, and invective requires exposure.

A reader e-mailed me just the other day threatening; “If you continue to insult, gouge, fight, poke fun at, and keep ripping the crap out archaeology, you’ll give me no option but to continue reading the ‘Saloon.’!!! JC.” Presumably the editorial content of SS and particularly that of the Malamute Saloon now gathering momentum to JC’s liking, is also becoming more widely read with greater attraction for enthusiasts from both the detecting and non-detecting communities who share our pro-collecting, pro-detecting, and pro-PAS stance; and join us in condemning the anti-PAS heritage circus not only as a politically driven cess-pit. The lunatics, as one reader put it, are almost running the archaeological asylum.

"Uncle" Joe Stalin

“Uncle” Joe Stalin

Despite the caricatures (of Dick Stout, and me ) drawn by the pro-nationalisation ‘Chuckle Brothers’ who’d like to keep ‘Uncle Joe’s’ ‘Red Flag Flying High,’ (by transferring property from private to State ownership) our mission is not to ridicule’ archaeology per se, but to expose the Rancid Reds and their worker/drone/clones and sundry hangers-on (colloquially, ‘The Haemorrhoids’) who are anxious to implement draconian curbs on the buying, selling, finding, and dealing in all antiquities in accord with the sentiments expressed by a former Director of the Council for British Archaeology, who was widely reported in the UK’s, Farmers Weekly, in 1982 as expressing at a public meeting that:-

“The trouble with a Thatcherite* government is that it looks after the interests of the landowner too well. In an ideal society all land would belong to the People. Unfortunately, we are some way from the nationalisation of all antiquities.” I know it to be true, I was at that meeting. [*Margaret Thatcher, who with President Reagan, defeated Communism. Dick]

Even today, many people still find those views appalling; along with all those who still slake their thirsts from the political samovar. Nevertheless, the Red Flag is still waved by cronies in the attacks on metal detecting and collecting. The fly in their ointment being that the US and UK are property-owning democracies and far from ready for a revolution any time soon. On a personal level, little nauseates me more than the following homage by Paul Barford, who describes himself as a British archaeologist living in Warsaw, Poland since 1986, who wrote in the Preface of his book, The Early Slavs: Culture and Society in Early Medieval Europe:-

“…as mentioned above, the present work is the result of a lengthy stay in what was then the People’s Republic of Poland, the Government of which was extremely generous in supporting my research, which then enabled me to take up employment at the University of Warsaw to continue my work. Let this book be in a small way part of the repayment of my debt I owe to those who helped my research.” Ugh, sick bag, please!

Simultaneously as Barford was being bankrolled by the communists and getting a leg-up into university, indigenous Poles too, were also enjoying the fruits of Polish Communism; food rationing; imprisonment without trial; political dissidents murdered; suspects tortured, and generally on the receiving end of the full attentions of the Sluzba Bezpieczenstwa, or SB, the Internal Security Service established in the People’s Republic of Poland in 1954. The most infamous case was the torture and execution by the SB of Catholic priest Jerzy Popieluszko in 1984. Since 1990, several SB operatives have been tried for their crimes. The SB is also suspected of killing Stanislaw Pyjas, and Catholic priest Stefan Niedzielak. It is reported to have abused priest Roman Kotlarz, who died mysteriously after a beating.

Paul Barford in my view, ought to be thoroughly ashamed of his hand-in-bra relationship with one of the most atrocious political regimes in modern history and he should acknowledge publically, again in my view, that he owes the Polish People a fulsome public apology. Neither is he in any position to question or criticise the integrity of others since his own moral compass is, well….questionable. The problem for radical ‘archaeologists’ is that people in democratic societies usually end up voting for what they want; usually making the kinds of life choices the radicals hate – in our case metal detecting. They have in the eyes of the majority, become irrelevant.

If you care to study the claptrap and drivel on any of these so-called ‘academic’ – not to mention whining, bleeding heart, archaeology blogs masquerading as moral high ground archaeo-fact sites – all of which portray YOU the hobbyist as serial heritage criminals, thugs, knuckle-draggers, and uneducated oiks as one of their number likes to describe hobbyists (but who himself is deeply suspected to have the psychological condition known as Narcissism), you will be more than amused to read that hobbyists don’t enjoy a monopoly of the villainy:-

Google Removes Story About Robert Daniels-Dwyer’s Conviction

Oregon Man Convicted in Indian Grave Theft and Murder-For-Hire Plot Dies in Prison

  Stolen Artifact Returned to Historical Society

The Acquisitive Curator

All of this I joyfully bring to your notice with huge dollops of out-and-out contempt, scorn, and unreserved disrespect, which I think regally befits these dim-witted, ethics-free shysters who seem blissfully unaware of the Berlin Wall’s demise in 1989; that Communism is now in history’s cess-pit and huge swathes of Europe returned to democracy; or that the world has moved on. They are desperately unhappy their hidden agendas (modelled on that which enslaved Europe, Post WW2) are being put under close scrutiny. In response, to having their oddball views given the third-degree their fall-back position is always ’victim mode,’ the default refuge of the gutless.

One has only to spend a few minutes perusing the more loathsome and hideous examples of these archaeo-blogs to understand the mind-set that drives them. However, such is the archaeo-blogosphere these days, that like death and taxes, those with an axe to grind will always be with us.

The news items outlined above are of the kind these commissars of chaos – amply typified by the likes of the usual and familiar suspects – persistently fail to remember when dishing out the malice and invective against collectors, detectorists, and any archaeologist/historian daring to oppose their views; and even castigate them for keeping silent. One of their number, Nigel Swift, Heritage Action’s Head Boy, scrapes the bottom of the barrel by inventing rural characters who purport to ‘advise’ farmers and landowners with vacuous baloney – posing as factual – about detecting. Mercifully, the irony is not lost on many landowners and farmers, who know that if ever these political archaeo-morons ever take power, they along with me no doubt, will be in the first wave of the Capitalist Class to be put against a wall and shot.

In his ongoing crusade for damaging ‘evidence’ against the hobby and hobbyists, Swift has taken to furtively hanging out in metal detector retailers and online forums earwigging on private conversations in the hope of hearing detectorists talking ‘dirty’ using words like ‘treasure’, ‘hammered coin’ ‘night,’ ‘sell’, and ‘hawk’. Saddest of all is how one of their denser bigots, who, as the current joke doing the rounds has it, now cleans latrines having lost what zlotys he had by investing in a franchise to repoint the Berlin Wall in 1990…..Ha! Ha!

And if you think double cream is thick, wait till you read their blogs! Seriously though:-

TAKE A GOOD LOOK at some of these cretins – or to use the vernacular of the obscene – knob-heads. They are precisely the kind of jihadists who strive (unsuccessfully) to destroy the PAS; to insult its administrators; to insult the staff of the British Museum; and to remove any public involvement in the heritage equation; and to bring ‘archaeology’ under their intellectual control and then… want taxpayers to not only foot the bill, but to entrust them with the oversight of the archaeological record. The only collateral these zany zealots have is their fact-free, heavily-discredited, junk database, known laughably as the Artefact Erosion Counter (AEC) which already has reduced ‘archaeology’ to the realms of make-believe. Decent, hard-working archaeologists deserve better than this kind of sewage …but when the Council for British Archaeology tacitly approved this same AEC pigs-swill in a failed attempt to score a point against the hobby…it turned itself into a music-hall joke. The longer the CBA remains linked to the kind of junk archaeology as typified by the claptrap of the AEC…the more of a sick joke it becomes.



In the radio world AM stands for Amplitude Modulation. In our world it stands for Archaeological Moron. I will not begin to tell you what FM stands for….Malamute Saloon


I’ll see you in the bar!




Filed under Metal Detecting

2 responses to “Time in Grade…

  1. Lisa MacIntyre

    We should all stop and think a minute before we spout. Very nice post. As for the “Mile High City” , the high part is correct all the ways it’s defined. I get very winded the whole time I’m there and a have a slight headache. And simply die of thirst constantly. Don’t go anywhere without a bottle of water. (NOT WINE) However if you visit any of the “green” shops on any corner, you simply wont care! And yes, they have real mountains, which according to my brother, are now covered in snow! Have fun!!

  2. Thanks Lisa. Not feeling very good tonight….so headaches are not something I’m looking forward to….

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